NEWSFLASH! Monbiot Uncovers Scandal of Youngsters Shooting Their Mouth Off in Chat Rooms.

Sarc./

Crack investigative reporter George Monbiot has uncovered a scandal involving thousands of young people going online and saying inappropriate things which might shock adults.

In a special report for The Guardian newspaper, Monbiot detailed how some young guys on a chat room affiliated to a motoring website were saying things they shouldn’t.

He reports that:

Readers of the motoring website Pistonheads picked up on the debate tour, and responded as follows:

audidoody: “Glocks are plastic and impervious to metal detectors aren’t they?”

tinman0: “No.”

Tsippy: “Molotov Cocktail?”

pilchardthecat: “I do hope some crazed yokel turns up and shoots the —- in the face. If he could pop ’round to Toynbee’s house on the way home and beat her to death that would be doubly awesome.”

audidoody: “tinman0 said: No.

“Um .. it wasn’t meant to be taken literally. As any fule kno, Glock’s are made from a high-strength nylon-based polymer invented by Gaston Glock and called Polymer 2 and that this plastic was specially formulated to provide increased durability and is more resilient than carbon steel and most steel alloys. My one-liner was a veiled reference to the event in Tucson. Oh, never mind.”

Guardian. Let’s Debate the Environment and Drop the Death Threats.

What’s particularly worrying about this development is that young guys who are into motor-sports are well known for never joshing, telling “one-liners” or saying stuff they don’t really mean. Instead, most young guys who frequent the chat rooms affiliated with motoring websites are known to be shy, thoughtful types who think long and hard before commenting on an issue, and never, ever make silly and inappropriate jokes.

Clearly these young men have been turned into vicious killers, probably by visiting websites which are openly sceptical on anthropogenic global warming. Their minds have obviously been warped by discussions on the role of water vapour in climate sensitivity, albedo feedback, and projected rates of temperature increase over the next century.

Monbiot intimates that he is releasing this special investigative report now, because “in the unlikely event” that he is assassinated (possibly by an undercover conspiracy against him) he wants people to know where the threat originated from:

Unlike the US, we don’t yet have a culture of grassroots political violence, so I’m only slightly concerned. But I’m writing this article so that, in the unlikely event that something does happen, you’ll know where it may have started.

It is to Monbiot’s credit that he continues to break the really big stories, like this scandal involving young guys saying naughty things online, even though he believes he might be assassinated.

Mr Monbiot is understood to be currently working on his next expose, revealing the scandal of young girls putting too much make-up on. He is is said to have gone into hiding after some comments on a chat room affiliated with a cosmetics website.

/sarc.

9 responses to “NEWSFLASH! Monbiot Uncovers Scandal of Youngsters Shooting Their Mouth Off in Chat Rooms.

  1. I think that he might be getting a little paranoid. If he ever is assasinated I think that it is likely to be one of the chicken littles, fed up with George continuously making them look stupid. Speaking for myself, I love him, I’ve lost count of the laughs that he’s given me.

    On the subject of death-threats, there are now warmists who are contemplating wiping out large swathes of the human population so I think this needs putting in perspective.

  2. Oh absolutely. The thing I love about Tory Boy is the sheer scale of his hypocrisy, it’s really quite gob-smacking.

    Take the article referred to in the post. He says “let’s drop the death threats”. What death threats? All it amounts to is some kids in a chat room joking around and trying to sound tough.

    When Monbiot says airline executives should be dragged out of their offices and drowned – hey, it’s all just a bit of fun, I was being ironic, he says. Yet some kids messing around on line is somehow sinister.

  3. Monbiot is a typical liberal hypocrite who’s had the de rigeur humour bypass operation. The particular hypocracy on show with his article is his failure to mention his position at president of that weird site, who’s name escapes me, that’s just there to recruit trolls and direct them at any blog post he considers not to be climatically correct.

    Pointman

  4. pistonheader since2003

    Whilst appreciating the term “youngsters”, I would like to correct the impression that PH is populated with kids (there are some that much is true) the vast majority are sober average guys (some business owners) who share an interest in all things motoring.

    It is renowned (and has been so since day one), as a sardonic abrasive community that pokes fun at all manner of things, and where freedom of speech (however distasteful) is supported and indeed fought for.

    The fact that some Journo who supports the current PSEUDO SCIENCE, takes these comments out of context to hype his profile should surprise no one!

    There are many retired and serving Police officers on the forum (and have been since day one. I have no doubt, that were these comments not seen as being the written equivalent of bar room banter, then the doors would already be coming off hinges.

    God help the young if the days of irreverant (yes sometimes shocking) remarks are to be eliminated due to people like Moonbiot!!

  5. For goodness sake George stop being a wannabe martyr.
    Get a grip man. Just because you’re a bit low at the moment because things are piling up doesn’t mean that you’ll stay like that.
    Grasp the present and form the future. As long as you’re honest with yourself, nobody else matters.
    Nobody!

  6. I’ve been on pistonheads since 2000.

    It is also where I found out about climategate, because a reguar started a thread, Climate Change Cat out of the Bag (500 pages, thousands of comments later still going strong) I would never have known about it otherwise, thanks BBC thanks MSM, and I downloaded FOIA2009.zip for myself and reacted badly to Harry_Read_Me.txt (I’m in IT)

    That was on the 2oth November 2009 and a link to Watts Up…

    How my life has changed since then, I have even started my own blog and get repeatably pre-moderated at the Guardian or just deleted. Guest posting at Bishop Hill and Watts up on occasion, would no doubt get me into one of George’s deniars Halls of Shame if I were a bit more famous.

    Pistonheads is a site with huge forums. Watts Up has 500,000 comments in total now, pistonheads has 3 million in one section alone.

    http://www.pistonheads.com/gassing/

    All ages, all incomes comment there and generally it is one of the most civilised internet forums going.

    Check out the New, Politics and Economics section.

    There is a community sense of humour as well, very ireverant at times, plus lots of serving and ex police officers are regulars.. Pub Banter… Try searching for Prescott , Brown. Cameron, Osborne huhne, Glegg, pub banter around these guys would make George Monbiot feel neglected and feel no-one is cares about him

    For the record, I was born in the 60’s

    Pistonheads was started by an enthusiast into TVR’s and originally called petrolheads. after about 10 years it was sold and is now owned by HayMarket publishing. Thus it is CORPORATE now, if the Guardian has any real problems with it they can talk to Haymarket I’m sure they have good lawyers, or is George just being sensationalist?

  7. http://www.pistonheads.com/contact/
    About PistonHeads
    PistonHeads.com was established in 1998 to provide an online magazine and community for sportscar enthusiasts.

    After many years of hard work, we’re very proud to have grown the site into one of the world’s biggest automotive communities. Each month over 2.5 million unique visitors use PH reading hundreds of millions of pages between them.

    The site remained in private ownership until January 2007 when it was acquired by its current owners Haymarket Publishing.

    —————–

    I imagnine the Guardian and George would be rather envious of those website statistics.

  8. I think the Moonbat has an over-inflated opinion of his own self importance.

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